No Cannes Do

For Kaya and Merv…

Nice, France. My first solo mission. After Bristol, I spent two more nights in London with my friend Stephen and then headed to the South of France…alone. No one to pick me up at the bus station or greet me upon arrival, just me, myself, and Alex. If I told you that I wasn’t a bit nervous then I’d be seriously lying, and since we’re all friends here, I would never do that to you. I was COMPLETELY nervous about this. If I’m being even more honest, I still am. You see, I do well alone. Always have. I really like “me” time. I’ve often thought it’s because I’m an only child that I do well on entertaining myself but I don’t even know if that’s it. I think you either know how to be with yourself or you don’t. That being said, being home and alone is very different than being on vacation and alone. Ask Kevin MacCallister. I’m sure he can verify. (Why am I always referencing him?!)

My first day in Nice, I headed to a beach called Villefranche Sur Mer. Stunning, though also not too challenging. Because here’s the thing, beach time alone doesn’t really count. Book, iPod, giant snooze in the sun.
Anyone can do that. I wasn’t really tested until that evening when I took myself to dinner in a very busy marketplace in the old town. Great people watching but there’s nothing like a lot of people around who aren’t talking to you to really make you feel alone. I did ok but was also very conscientious of the fact that there was in fact, no plus one facing me. Logically, I bought myself a bracelet after dinner to soothe my tensions a bit.

The next morning I woke up to the grayest of gray clouds, sat downstairs at the hostel breakfast and pondered what in the world I was going to do all day. Then, when I wasn’t even looking for it, a big lesson came my way. Her name was Kaya.

“Is it ok if I sit here?” she asked me. “I should try and be social.”

As we sat there eating our toast, we did your typical small talk. Where are you from? Where were you last? Where are you headed next? She was hungover from the night before. I had no idea what in the world to do in this rain. Blah. Blah. She was off to lie back down and I was going to head to Cannes though the sky was threatening.

“Have a good day,” I told her. And we were off in separate directions.

After waiting in a 45 minute line at the train station to purchase my ticket to Cannes because the ticket machines didn’t have an English option, I was on my way. I spent less time on the train actually getting there. However, the further west we went, the harder the rain started to fall. By the time I got off the train in Cannes, it was absolutely pouring. Not your average pouring, but like tropical weather monsoon pouring. As I watched the lightening streak through the sky approximately 10 feet in front of the train station and listened to thunder so loud it made me jump every time, I determined that even my hot pink duck umbrella wasn’t going to keep me safe from this weather. So it was back on the train I went. Literally, never even stepped out of the station. No Cannes do.

While this may have seemed like a waste of a day, I think it all came together like that on purpose. You see, as I sat on the train I thought about what Kaya said about being social, thought about how at breakfast I was going to ask her if she wanted to join me but then decided not to. Sometimes it’s scary to put yourself out there because you don’t know what the response will be. Sometimes the response is extremely positive leaving you happily uplifted and sometimes the response is shockingly negative with a damaging effect. I know both feelings well. Upon arriving back at the hostel, I got my second chance. There she was sitting at the computers in the common area. I immediately took the opportunity to check my ego and fix my wrongs. I sat down next to her and we got to talking, and computering, simultaneously, for hours. As we chatted I came to find out that Kaya is only 18 years old. She graduated high school in Missoula, Montana and took a year off to travel and work on different farms. She started in Ghana with a group from school and then continued on to Morocco for a month on her own. If I wasn’t already impressed that she was 18 and sitting in a hostel in the south of France alone, now I really was. I spent a weekend in Morocco and couldn’t imagine being there by myself. After Morocco, Kaya was in Paris and then Nice. Alone. Are you kidding me? I was blown away by this girl. I’ve always been a self-aware, confident person but I know for a fact I would have never had the guts or wherewithal to navigate Europe and Africa on my own at 18. When we had sufficiently facebooked and both bemoaned the fact that not enough people email us when they know we’re lacking travel companions (cough, cough), I did what I should have done the first time. I was going to head to Monaco, Cap d’Ail, Antibes, and back to Cannes the next day, and I asked her if she wanted to join. She happily accepted and I was further reminded of the fact that it never hurts to ask.

That night we also met an Aussie named Merv who was on his own as well. And what didKaya do, she asked. So the next day the three of us, total strangers, but all on a similar mission in life, set out together. I have to tell you it was kind of a beautiful thing. I had about 2 and a half days worth of places to see due to the rain limitations and was afraid these two would never hang and would potentially hold me back. How wrong I was. Ego check. They added something to my day that I would have never had had I been too afraid to ask. They added company, they added laughter, they shared stories. I wasn’t just with two people. I learned about two people. I had a life experience with two people. Because of them, I was reminded of what can come to you if you approach people openly, be yourself, ask the question, and put yourself out there. And most importantly, whenever I’m feeling lonely or unsure of myself while I’m on my own, all I have to think is… if Kaya can do it, I can do it.



And NowEuropeToDate...